I’m excited to introduce you to a person with real-life super powers, Tonya Dawn Recla. I loved our conversation, including how we all have superpowers and finding the extraordinary in the ordinary. As the Executive Director of Super Power Experts®, Tonya spends her days convincing people superpowers are real and recruiting other powerful mutants. During her career as a government Special Agent, she explored the human psyche, honed her superpowers, and cracked the code of enlightened self-actualization. Tonya continues as a lifelong student of energy manipulation, transmutation, clair senses, intentional molecular creation, etc. She believes everyone has the power to create a multidimensional existence and master the human experience. Learn more about Tonya and her organization at superpowerexperts.com.
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Mastering Your Superpowers & More w/ Tonya Dawn Recla
I am really jazzed up as I am every moment of every day. I’m ecstatic because I have another amazing goddess with me with great experience in business in the personal transformation that I get to share with all of you. Her name is Tonya Dawn and she’s got an amazing company called Super Power Experts. I’d prefer if you would share with us just one or two nuggets that you want people to know about you as a human being. In addition to the fact that you run a company and you’re an entrepreneur and you’re hugely successful and you mentor and coach people and you’ve done that all over the world. You made a huge difference and that’s truly special. I want our folks to know who you are, not that who are you thing but what you want them to know about you.
Thank you so much for having me. I always love a moment to connect with you. I’m excited about what transpires between us always when we commit to that space. The biggest piece is exactly that this is what I do these days, 24/7, is that connection. I tell people I have hundreds of birthing projects all over the world. I operate on a concept of synergistic collaboration and it’s committing to the love and the energy that exists between us. A lot of people would say it’s maybe a little bit ironic given the fact that I’m an Army veteran, counter-intelligence, the whole spy world stuff. It’s like, “What is she doing talking about love and consciousness and all kinds of good stuff?” That’s the path. Most of us who are doing this magic work have some a story that’s rooted in real practicality and linearity and more traditionalism. I’m no exception to that. We could go through the gamut but ultimately the most important piece is that my work in the world is being that bridge. Bringing everyone into the conversation whether it’s the way woo-woo, metaphysical, energy realms or the practical business entrepreneurship. There’s real change and shift happening. The only way that happens is through that continued integration and I’m the embodiment of that.
Embodiment, I know you know my own story. Our tribe knows it. It’s a story about change. About how you utilize change which is everywhere around us so the change doesn’t become something we fear and react to but something that we embrace and that we respond to. That to me is an embodiment practice. When you said embodiment, that’s what came up for me. You are one of those people that does embody it. I meet a lot of great people and there are people who are great at acting, who they present themselves as is sometimes pretty great. I don’t always buy or think that you’re exactly that way in other contexts. I got this real deep feeling of authenticity from you, that you are at the core just exactly who you appear to be and whether people like it, don’t like it, get it, don’t get it, not really your concern. I call that being able to stand in your power. You are obviously committed to power. It’s part of what you do as company. Maybe we could speak to that. The word authenticity is what comes up for me. Thank you for that. I’d love to know whether that’s been the case for you all of your life or whether that’s been a pivot along the way that you’ve learned and been able to transition into that embodiment of a more powerful and true beingness.
That’s why you and I connect because we can see and honor that in each other. Those of us who do this work, we just get to a place where it’s like, “That’s it.” The phrase, “Suffer fools lightly.” I just don’t have a lot of patience for those who are unwilling to traverse the uncomfortable spaces. I have ultimate and absolute patience for those who are willing to even if they’re not well-versed at it. The willingness to me is what tugs at my heart and keeps me going. It’s in the unwillingness to move in to those spaces because they suck sometimes. They’re deep and they’re rooted and they’re gushy and not all that great but there are secrets and magic in those spaces. To answer your question, it’s yes to both. The authenticity has been a constant unfoldment process but the commitment to that journey has always been there. It’s taken many different layers as the onion concept. We peel back the layer that looks different. The root of it was that commitment to my own evolution above all else and to the detriment of everything else. Then I brought that into our marriage, I brought that into motherhood. I brought that into all of it and it’s a kick in the pants when it’s like, “I can’t just be a wife to my husband or a mother to my daughter,” but what we can do is these two solid holistic whole beings and three whole beings walk beside each other. That creates a whole different dialogue than the idea that somehow we’re obligated to engage in societal roles or to honor or entertain lower frequency spaces and people.
That’s ultimately what you’re seeing that you’re picking up on is that we think it’s compassion and we think that it’s sincerity when we meet people in their misery or when we meet them in a lower frequency space. It takes real courage to say, “I’m not going to honor that in you. That’s not true. What I am going to honor is where we connect in the space where we’re all connected, where love is the frequency. Love is what binds us together. I’m going to honor that above all else. That may mean that it doesn’t sound real pretty in the moment and that may mean that I’m not your favorite person in that second but I have a lot of support and strength and a whole community and God behind me to say, “There’s something bigger and I’m going to hold that vision for you until you can see it yourself.”
I’m processing that distinction. That’s pretty profound. We talked a lot about meeting people where they are and typically, when I think of that, that’s a good thing. Not good or bad but that makes sense to meet people where they are. The layer below that is, “Do you end up staying with them where they are? Is that your intention to meet them where they are?” I know our intention is to meet with them and then to help them to elevate themselves. What I also heard you say is that, it’s not necessarily the case that you want to tolerate or that you’ll spend a lot of your time necessarily in the space of someone else in their misery if they’re not willing to see or try or attempt to move beyond that.
I flipped the process. I do it opposite. Instead of meeting them where they’re at and trying to race them, it’s really challenging. Energy seeks to balance itself. It’s much easier for you to get pulled down into a frequency you’re already familiar with than to pull somebody up into a frequency that perhaps they haven’t embodied yet. They exist there but they may not be consciously aware of it. I just flip it. I meet them in that higher echelons base and affirm that for them. Then what I find is that the language that they can connect with just naturally comes through. It’s their language. It’s their information. Trusting that connection where we exist up there to guide the process as opposed to allowing my mind to come in and say, “I know where you’re sitting here,” because ultimately all that is it’s representing an aspect of myself in a lower frequency place. All it’s doing is encouraging that for both of us. If we’re honest, we all do this work because it’s the next phase of our own evolution. To pretend that I can look at somebody and say, “You’re here, you’re here,” and I’m going to meet you and talk to you, all I’m doing is coddling a lower frequency aspect of myself and we just stay there together. You exist there so you can go down there and that’s why it feels so real to people. They’re like, “But it feels real.” I was like, “It feels real, but does it feel good?” This is also real but there just aren’t that many places and people that affirm that existence for us. That’s important work to do as well.
This is wonderful and I’d love to know where either that shows up in your works or if you could tell us a little bit about the work that you do and how that’s incorporated into that process, I feel like that’s a good place to go from here.
I connect with people in what I call the abstract frequency. All that yummy, gooeyness that we were talking about and I typically stay there. I get knocked down from time to time but my goal is to stay in that solidity. You brought up power before, my whole journey started about ten years ago when I wrote the book, W.A.R.: The Ultimate Guide to Personal POWER and Safety. That was my understanding of it at the time. I talked about situational awareness coming from the army and counterintel and stuff. It was a natural positioning for me to start combining self-awareness and spiritual awareness into situational awareness. That was a big component that I felt was missing in a lot of those dialogues. When I added that in and you’ve got your stories, I’ve got mine. That’s what led me to some of the realizations. Over time, what that led me to was instead of the conversation around personal power, it led me into what I named individual resonance; owning the energy and owning your energy signature.
Most people are broadcasting their insecurities all the time and they have no idea that they’re doing it. Their words are saying one thing but their energy is broadcasting, “We should teach this to counterintel agents.” If you can pick up on the energy signatures, you know how to get people to do what you want them to do. That’s the point. That’s the name of that game. I came out of that and just used my powers in a little bit of a different fashion. That’s what led me into the whole superpower dialogue which in my opinion is full autonomy. Ultimately, that’s all any of us can really aim for, is our own mastering that personal power, developing our own autonomy. In that space now, we can move into what I call using your superpowers which is where we choose to use them for good. We commit to using them for good and we choose to do that with other people. You can’t collaborate until you have that autonomy. If you move into collaboration prematurely, you’re constantly defining yourself through the collaboration as opposed to coming in with the solidity of self, allowing the collaboration to continue to mold and shape you just like a marriage does or any other relationship. You have to know where your center is or else the next thing you know, that creates competition and ego and fear and all that good stuff. We need some solid collaborations to resolve some of the challenges. I’m not a real doomsdayer, but the idea that we all know ultimately that we can do this better. That’s going to require us all coming together and working together. There’s work that has to be done prior to even that point. It’s Pollyannish to think that we’re all going to come together and join hands and come up with solutions. Not enough people haven’t done the work on themselves to figure out what piece they even hold for the puzzle.
This is one of the central line where you and I are connected. From my perspective, it’s that idea that it’s about personal responsibility and personal accountability and to ourselves. Wanting more for the world, wanting the world to be a better place, for us, we love peace. That’s what we want is people to have their peace and to have peace in our greater community. It’s not about politics or about politicians or about governments or any of those things that are abstract for most people. It’s about us individually working on our piece. Doing the work ourselves to actualize the highest and best versions that we can be, it creates peace in us and then ultimately is the offering that we make to everybody that we interact with. Your energy is there ahead of you probably, ahead of your words, it’s ahead of your thoughts. It’s that energy that’s either taking or giving. I’ve heard it said, “affecting or infecting,” It’s that thing. To own that, to be responsible for our own energy, to be powerful in that regard that we’re managing that for ourselves, for our highest good becomes the highest good of everybody around us. I sometimes say that we’d have world peace when enough people are Selfishly working on their own personal inner peace, our world will be peaceful. It hits a tipping point where there’s just more of that energy than there is the energy in people doing other things.
It goes so far beyond that which is where the superpower dialogue came in. I love everything that you’re saying. The challenge is that, in order to see it from that perspective, you have to start entertaining the idea that perhaps things aren’t as we thought they were. The willingness to play with concepts like The Matrix in energetic woowoowiness is a multi-dimensional concept. What happens is when you go down those trajectories and you start playing a little bit, you recognize that the world is a projection of what’s happening internally for you. You deny it internally and it has to show up in your external environment to get your attention and that’s the process. The idea that we can go out and change the world but not pay attention to the self is quite erroneous and it is selfish. It’s the most selfish thing in the world. However, it ends up on the flipside of that being the most selfless thing in the world. The idea that, “Be the change you want to see in the world,” those weren’t just pretty words. You can’t affect your external environment unless you’re willing to look internally first and manage it. We teach this stuff all the time. The biggest problem I see is most people lack the discipline or the willingness to counter themselves in every single moment and say, “What frequency am I operating from?”I don’t mean high energy versus low energy. You don’t need to be bouncing off the walls and putting on a big show but when you start to attune yourself to frequencies and that’s for that individual resonance comes into play, you can take responsibility in every moment for what you’re creating in the next and it becomes a practice. Then you exude that and then you model that and then you impact others with it. Then you look at situations and you can see solutions in a very different way because you’re not operating from fear first, but it is a practice.
[Tweet “You can’t affect your external environment unless you’re willing to look internally first and manage it.”]
Why don’t you lead us into what that awareness practice is. I’ve heard that before. I love the way you point it out. It’s not just rah-rah energy versus quiet. It’s something deeper than that superficial fuel of energy. What is that energy at its core? How can people tuning into this can tune into the frequency? How would recommend they do that?
It looks different in different levels. I’m not shirking that question but I want to affirm for people that it always looks different at different frequencies. We start people off in a whole like, “You’re not your mind.” Just really simple like managing your thoughts, managing what emotions you’re exuding. Paying attention to why those are coming up, where those triggers are happening. We work a lot with triggers whether it be cognitive, emotional or vibrational triggers and helping to identify what’s happening? Taking a step back and going, “Whoa,” rather than just pushing forward from programmed behaviors and patterns. “What is going on?”Question everything initially. Just go like, “Why am I acting this way? Why am I really upset?” We work with our daughter, she’s seven now but we work with her a lot on and it used to be, she’d move quickly into anger and so keeping it at sadness. Where was their first emotion? At that stage a couple of years ago, it was that sadness. Training her to be, “Stay sad. Stay sad.” We don’t want to stay sad because it feels vulnerable. But stay sad for half a second and ask. “What is it that you’re really seeking?”
Once she got really good at that, then we had to move her into a new process. Once you’ve mastered a process, you have to be willing to develop a new one. We moved her into the space of looking even beyond the emotion and what is it that you’re truly, truly seeking? We’ve got her now to where she can recognize and she goes, “I feel like I just need some connection.” “Let’s connect.” Let’s start there and make sure you’re operating from a solid foundation before you take action. Sometimes you have to take a step back and go, “I feel really adrift. I feel alone. I feel unloved. I feel unsupported and unprotected. Why do I feel afraid right now? What is the fear?” We use timeout a little bit differently in our family and it’s timeout, go find the fear. Go figure out what is underneath all of this and let’s address the fear. Let’s talk about what’s real. She’s learned that I’ll stop everything that I’m doing and talk for hours about what’s real but not the stories and not the overlays and not the dramas around what we don’t want to take a look at. Those are simple techniques that you can start with. The bigger piece is allowing yourself to recognize that you have all these different pieces and parts inside of you. That’s where people get tripped up. They’re like, “But it feels real. I feel sad.”I was like, “Of course, you do. An aspect of you feel sad but the way you connect at your highest isn’t sad. You’re phenomenal, you’re beautiful, you’re this amazing, infinite, multidimensional being. Which aspect of you do you want to connect with?” It’s not shirking the emotions and hiding them and ignoring them, it’s moving to that observer role and saying, “What is going on here? What is the fear?” Getting a bit of perspective on things is key.
I moved away from the whole ego dialogue a long time ago because I felt it didn’t give me credit for the work I’d already done. I just worked through this ego issue, then here’s my ego again. It’s like, “This thing won’t go away.” I started breaking it all up into pieces and parts and then I get credit for a part that I’ve loved and integrated, but then there’s another part. It’s not the same part. I didn’t do it wrong. I didn’t have to go back and learn that lesson. I’m just learning it in a different way at a different level. It just motivated me to keep going on that process. There are different techniques that you can use and then ultimately the guidance is to stay in that highest frequency and that’s where that knowledge of your own internal resonance comes into play. The reason why that’s so crucial is energetic manipulation and whether they’re manipulating an environment or being manipulated by it in every moment. You choose. We don’t like to talk about things like manipulation. It feels icky. We don’t like to think about it. You are being manipulated in every single scenario and you are manipulating others. Own that, recognize it and make a choice about how you’re going to manipulate the environment. We’re seeing energetic manipulation being used. It’s like NLP on crack. It’s a powerful tool but when people are wielding it without that solid sense of self and that solid embodiment of those higher frequencies, it can get ugly pretty fast. It wreaks more havoc on the individual’s personal life as we know than on anything that they can do to others. There’s typically some collateral damage along the way. Just asking people to be responsible for that.
What’s come up for me as I’m listening to you, I thought, somebody who’s participating is actively listening to what we’re saying might say, “Great. You go find the fear.” You said there are ways to begin. One was this question that your daughter uses that you’ve given her which is, “What is it you’re really seeking?” That’s a very powerful question and I’m a huge believer that asking powerful questions is a very significant way to up level your life even when you don’t have the answers, especially when you don’t have answers. To me, the most powerful questions are the ones you don’t have answers to. You ask them knowing and believing and having faith at some level in the universal law which to me is that questions and answers have a cause and effect relationship. You cannot ask a question that you will not get an answer to. You will always get an answer, you just might not get it in the timeframe that you want it. You might want it now but you’re not going to get it now. It’s like having somebody’s name that you can’t think of. It’s on the tip of your tongue and can’t remember it but then you let it go and an hour later, you’re washing dishes or something and the name pops in your head. What is it that you’re really seeking?
You also said, “Go find the fear.” When you go after the fear, you’re seeking to find out what it is that you’re actually fearful of, what’s the step at that moment? That seems to me like a pivotal moment. For you, when you go inward and allow yourself to feel what you’re feeling and not try to shoo it away or distract it or get busy to create drama so that you’re not thinking about that anymore. You sit with it and you go find it and you find it. That’s an interesting moment. It’s like going to look for tiger and you find the tiger. Tell us what that’s like for you?
I sit with it until it doesn’t have that constricted feeling anymore. I love it. Part of it is the belief that we carry a light within us that can overcome any fear. The first step is recognizing that it’s all fear. If it’s not love, it’s fear. If it’s not expansive in light, it’s constricting and there’s some element of fear but there’s a profound belief, I love that you brought up this tiger image. It reminded me biblically ironically about Daniel in the Lion’s Den. You have to have an unwavering confidence that you have a light and it’s connected to something so much greater than yourself and so much bigger than yourself that no matter what the fear is, if you just have your little itty-bitty flame walking into it, it will change it. It does start to dissipate the fear and that fear will hide from the light. We know this. You can’t chase it around but you’ve got to be in it. It’s gross and it sucks and it feels oppressive and it hurts and you want to cry and you do all of that but you stay in it. You start doing that in our conversations. You don’t run away from them. You don’t try to overlay them. I’m noticing this in marriages, in parenting, all of it. You stay in it energetically and you just know that as long as you lead with love, and that’s out front and center, it changes everything always. It can’t help but and it’s just that confidence. It doesn’t mean that you’re going to have the answer right away. I love what you said about keeping that question loop open. Don’t let the mind or the fear try to close it up. Keep it open and just say, “I don’t know what’s going to happen here, but I know ultimately I’m safe.”
Sometimes you have to play little mind games with yourself towards like, “Am I safe right now?”In this moment and it may just be in this millisecond, “Am I okay?” “Yeah but you might not be okay in two seconds.” “But in this millisecond, am I okay?” And then next one and then the next one. Sometimes that’s all you can do is just in every moment. You got to manage all of those pieces and parts. I call it sitting on your throne, that sovereign. As long as that sovereign is sitting on his or her throne, all those other parts will submit. They will calm down. They will submit. If they’re wreaking havoc, it means that that sovereign, the king or queen is not sitting on the throne. Get back on the throne, listen to what they’re saying. You’re not going to just dismiss your subjects because they’re fearful of the dragon that’s coming to eat them. You go, “What’s the concern? What do we need to talk about?” I hold full onboard meetings when I wake up. “How’s everybody doing? All my pieces and parts, where are we at?” Just let them have a voice. When you do that, it starts to demystify that process. When you try to shut them down or hold them up or whatever you’re doing or ignoring them or pretending they’re not there, they just get louder. They force that projection then in your environment. You’re going to take notice one way or the other. I’d rather do it willingly.
I love that image. I appreciate the visual of the sovereign and that sovereign being your higher self, your true knowledge. The knowledge of your true being which is love and connection. It’s a profound learning for sure that in a moment you can check in with yourself by asking a question. Is the sovereign on the throne? Who’s driving the bus here? More often than not, if people are being honest and I’d say this about myself too, more often it’s fear driving the bus. To be present to that gives you other options, other choices. What you were saying about frequencies, it occurred to me that reacting and responding. I want people to tangibly feel out what frequencies look like when we’re talking about energy. For the most part, we talk about this high energy and low energy. What you’ve given us is some gray matter on there’s more there than just how we even physically perceive energy. Reacting and responding, these are different energies.
What I want to affirm for your listeners too because over the last eighteen months, you and I tend to attract a lot of the movers and shakers, the people who are here to have an impact on the world. Over the last eighteen months in our podcast over at the Super Power Experts, I’ve talked with a number of those individuals. Most of them are sitting in a place of fear right about now because they don’t know what’s next. They climbed their own mountain, they might speak and then they’re sitting there going, “What’s next?” This ties into your pivot concept. It’s the willingness to continue to say, “What if the next thing looks different than what we thought it was going to?” What I really want to affirm is that as we go through this process, that attunement process gets more and more and more subtle. I contend that you reach a point where you cannot see those fear pieces on your own. They’re too subtle. We needed help moving the big boulders and the rocks and then we needed help moving the pebbles. Why would we think that we wouldn’t need help moving the grains of sand and the dust that remains at these higher frequencies?
You have to find people who are sitting in a vibration that’s either right where you’re going or similar to yours to get assistance in seeing that. What I’m seeing over and over and over again is that people are confusing material success with this next layer of growth. They’re seeking advice from people who are as afraid and as confused as they are. It’s all the folks who are sitting on mountains of money, whatever’s going on. They’re not admitting that that money is going away. Those relationships are going away. Those businesses are failing because they don’t know what comes next. If you’re in that situation, please stop telling people to do exactly what you’re doing because it’s not working. Sit back and go, “What needs to change here?” Be willing to face it courageously and say, “I built this whole brand around this concept.” You growing doesn’t mean that your brand is no longer effective. It means it’s no longer effective for you. We build our brands and businesses so that we can move on. You build a convergence around an idea that is still helpful to people at certain frequencies, now move into the next one. There are people looking for you. I talk to them all the time. We need more and more people being willing to pull the veil back and go, “There’s something that comes next.” We all broke out of The Matrix and no one said, “By the way, you just built a new construct.” Wouldn’t it make sense if someone may have to break out of that one and go into the next one?
What’s now and what’s next? In 1955, they started tracking the 500 most successful companies and they call it the Fortune 500. They still do. They still track the 500 most successful companies that are publicly traded. In that index, when you look at the companies that were on the original index, only less than 12% of these companies exist today. These were the companies that you would have thought would be around forever and yet they’re not. They weren’t thinking about what’s next? They weren’t working on the business that they would be in over time by looking ahead at where they would need to be different or provide something that was different and where the world would be different. They were just in essence protecting what they had. Protecting the status quo on some level. Playing more defense than anything else. That’s really important because at the root of why we do what we do in regard to pivot is to help people to break out of that. The trying to keep safe, yet it’s still an existing paradigm that’s all based in fear.
[Tweet “You have to be able to walk in the middle of the storm.”]
I just got done telling our whole group. I was like, “Here’s the deal. If you’re waiting for the chaos to slowdown, you’re going to be really disappointed. You have to be able to walk in the middle of the storm.” The only hope that you have is to find resonance and to find some stability within yourself so that you can walk in the storm. That’s the work. It’s easy to do our work at the top of our mountain and wait for people to come to us. You can help onesies and twosies but most of us have gotten visions and information and guidance that there’s more to do. The only way you do this, you have to walk back down off the mountain and go back into the world that you’ve just pulled yourself out of. How can you do that if you don’t have the tools to maintain your own frequency and solidity as you’re doing the work in a place that it needs to be done? That’s a whole different process than climbing up your mountain.
It’s the perfect place to take the last segment of our show which is regarding the practices. I call them rituals. Some people feel like there are religious tones with that, to me it’s not. I refer to that as master habits. Covey had his seven habits. To me, what are the master habits? The ones that you consciously create to use your words, to maintain your resonance, to maintain your solidity knowing that you’re walking into a storm or that a storm is about to start or you’re coming out of a storm. Either way, that you are grounded and centered. Could you share at least maybe one ritual, something that you do that keeps you in that solidified state?
I stay connected to my lifelines. That’s what I call them. I find the people who are amazing at what they do. I know exactly what they’re amazing at and where they play really well. What puzzle piece they hold and I use them in that regard. I keep them close. I often have five-minute conversations with somebody. I’ll be like, “I just need to,” and sometimes they don’t have to say a word. There is magic in the space between us. When we’re willing to come together and connect with people in these higher frequencies, magic always happens right between us and sometimes it’s just meeting together in love and saying, “I hear you.” I’m like, “Have you considered this?” Sometimes it’s just a one sentence thing and I’m like, “That’s what I needed. Awesome. Thank you.” We’re off and running again. Those of us who do this work, we’re busy. We have stuff to do. There’s real work to be done in the world. You have to know who’s in that space with you. Find your allies. Look to your left, look to your right and don’t look for the money folks. There’s a whole group of people who didn’t use money as a catalyst in this lifetime and they achieved material success without achieving that vibrational resonance that is going to be necessary moving forward. Be really cautious who you hand over that authority to. Ultimately, you want the people who are going to help you build up your own individual authority and support. That’s what Super Power Experts is all about. We have a whole network of people so that people can find their allies and get the support they need so they can do this work in the world.
What I heard you say was that you stay close to what you called your lifelines, which are other people that support you or that you feel supported from.
Absolutely, and who operate in a resonance and the frequency that is in alignment with where I’m at or where I’m going.
You’re not entrusting your energy or infecting your energy with some folks especially if you’re in a vulnerable place that you get with somebody. Chelsea, our oldest daughter, and I actually think of this as we talk about chunking up or chunking down. When you chunk down, you get into that muddy place with people. They’re on survival mode or scarcity mode and they’re drowning. I was a lifeguard for a lot of years and the first instinct of a drowning person, believe it or not, is to drown someone else. When you chunk up, when you’re in that space with people that are wanting to raise their energy and are in fact raising their energy, raising that vibration off for themselves. It’s amazing when we hang around with people that have a good energy. Your energy is just there. It matches up or it matches down is the concept. It doesn’t mean that you don’t have compassion. I have compassion for people who are in a bad place and all that but it’s what you said, it’s bringing this to full circle. My job isn’t necessarily to get in the muddy place with them because it’s very difficult to help. It’s tough to help when you’re in the quicksand with them. It’s better to be handing them a stick or a rope or whatever you can do to help them to pull themselves out or you help them to get out of there. Just recognizing too as a part of how we’re built as human beings that oftentimes and I wouldn’t have known this if I hadn’t been a lifeguard, their instinct for survival reasons is to take their arms and wrap them around you. Hold on for dear life while you both drown.
It’s not out of ego. It’s not out of any malice. It’s out of fear. It’s just an instinct that we have that says, “Help me get some solid footing in this space.” Ironically, the best thing you can do is to knock it in that space with them. Certainly assist or take in enough resources with you when you go. If you have to go in there and get them, make sure you’ve got your rope or you’ve got your lifesaver, whatever tools you utilize. If you go in unarmed and you go in not filled and not fueled or at a lower frequency, you’re right, you’re both going under.
I used some analogies from that experience. I spent seven years as an ocean lifeguard but I have not used this one before. I didn’t see that aspect of it. Not just from the standpoint of don’t get in a situation where you’re going to get drowned by somebody else. More or less, the idea that you come in resource and I did. We would work up an hour in the stand. Down an hour, up an hour, down an hour because the hours we were in the stand, often we were constantly making saves. It was a very busy ocean, beach, thousands and thousands of people, riptides and rough water and all that kind of thing. On the down hours, we would run, we would swim, we would lift weights in the shack, we would eat our lunch, we were taking care of ourselves physically. We were in camaraderie and we had a great team, great crew. When it was rough out there, we wouldn’t go in alone. We’d go in, we have the buoy, the lifesaver, you have your fins on sometimes. You have your other mates that were going to swim up and it’s three or four of us out there. Sometimes we have the dory out, the boat that was out there, whatever we needed, the power board, the surfboard. We had equipment to make sure that we could do that job which was to save lives and help people and not lose life. Not lose those folks’ lives, not lose our lives. That’s a process.
The climb up the mountain is very individual. I affirm that absolutely. It is a solo journey. The climb back down that mountain is a collaborative venture. You have to be willing to come together, grow transparently in the presence of others, be vulnerable, be transparent and uplift everybody as you go. The more of us who do that, we’re exponentially more powerful together. Two plus two equals a thousand. It’s not a one-on-one but exponentially more impactful when we choose to come together. When we bring our own strength into it and our willingness to see ourselves and to not hide from that and not to put on airs or to put on masks and all these other crap that we do, you’re broadcasting the insecurities anyway. Stop. You’re never the most intuitive person in the room anymore. Trust me. Somebody knows if you’re not comfortable or confident in what you’re saying. Be honest.
I’d love for you to share, where is it that our community can find more information about you and the work that you do?
SuperPowerExperts.com, pretty easy. There’s a little quiz on the homepage. You can find out what are your superpowers. If you hear a yes, then come join us. It’s like an energetic Verizon network. If you know you’re here to do impactful work in the world, you have to be supported and that’s the work that we do in the world.
Thank you so much for being a special light in our presence. Thank you for that.
Thank you for the invitation. It’s always a pleasure and I honor you for everything that you do in the world.